Divorces that involve children can be among the most difficult. However, it all comes down to how parents handle things. You may worry about your children suffering no matter what you do, but they won’t. There are many things that people assert about children going through divorce that simply aren’t true, and some myths that could actually hurt children’s adjustment to divorce.
For example, you may have heard that divorcing early in your child’s life is better, because they’ll be too young to remember it and won’t have trauma from it. However, children who are two or older are likely to have some memories linked to their parents’ split. Therefore, you should still take steps to ease them into the divorce and the changes that come with it.
Consistency is key for children
Another myth many parents believe is that children will simply adjust to the differences between their parents’ households. The reality is that shared custody is the best way forward. Having consistent expectations and consequences helps your child understand what to expect at either home.
Hiding a divorce won’t help
There is also a harmful myth that parents should lie or cover up the divorce if they have young children, making up stories or pretending like nothing is wrong. Kids are smart, though, and they will know if something isn’t right. It’s best to tell a child about a divorce as a united front and to be calm while doing so.
These are some myths and the realities behind them. If you are divorcing, remember that you are the person responsible for guiding your children through this change in your family’s lifestyle.